When You Can't Even Convince The Cartoon Mascot...

I hate it when life makes you do things and stuff.  Anyway, hopefully I'll be back for a while.

 

This is a sign I saw recently when I had lunch at a international Scottish restaurant chain. I believe they are trying to encourage kids to eat more healthily, like drinking milk instead of soda.  However that's not what's happening in this scene.  The child is giving his milk to a goat.  This is exactly what happens in every household that serves liver: it gets slipped under the table to whatever pet is hiding under there.  So this doesn't really encourage children to make better diet choices as it shows them how to avoid eating them.  Ahh, America.

No Technology Here...

This post has the potential for starting a flame war but here goes.  Frankie and I went to Cedar Point amusement park a couple of weekends ago and, while waiting in line for Top Thrill Dragster, we were presented with this sight (click the picture to enbiggen).  Now maybe I'm just missing out on something here but the sight of individuals dressed in such garb waiting in lines for a roller coaster just seemed incongruous.  But I could be wrong.

Charlie Brown's O Face

I saw this during a recent trip to a local grocery store.  I think they are there to promote the caramel apples, since that's what Snoopy's sign says (click the picture to enbiggen).  What they actually do is creep people the hell out.  Every single person who walked by while I was there said some variation of "Oh, my!"  I really don't know which is worse: Charlie Brown's zero-shaped head or the fact that it looks like Snoopy had some terrible eye accident.

A Generation Of Scarecrows

Our newest field correspondent, Agent Superstar!, took this and sent it to me.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

 

It's a sad state of affairs when schools have to resort to donated clothing for funding. I do, however, find the word "Kiducation™" very catchy and it just rolls off the tongue.  What really bothers me is the phrase "We turn used clothing into new kids..."  That just has a disturbing sound to it.  As Agent Superstar! stated "they have mad powers of transfiguration".

Just Don't Associate With Our Real Guests

Field correspondent Shu snapped this picture and sent it to me.

 

 

Nothing makes you feel more welcome than being told to stay hidden. Also, don't tell anyone we let you in.

 

Editor's note:  I think the quotation marks are in the wrong location.  I think it should read: TRUCKERS "WELCOME".

Maybe You Wade Through That...

 

Frankie found this ad in a Discover magazine.  She hypothesized that it's supposed to be a tadpole but that ain't what it looks like.  Taken out of context it looks even worse...



VHS Still Exists?

Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq. provides yet another submission. 

 

How hard did someone have to try to shove a VHS tape into a DVD slot to warrant a warning of this size and magnitude.  And once they got it in there, did it play?  Of course this makes complete sense when you learn it was taken at the retirement home and is directed to 80 year old little old ladies.

The Day The Music Failed To Live

I saw this a couple days ago when I was at a local bar and grill (click the picture to enbiggen).  This is really for all us nerds.  It seems you can't go anywhere these days without seeing a Billy Gates error message.  Not that I'm a conspiracy theorist but I'm sure Gates could take complete control of the world whenever he wanted.  For those BSOD lovers (you know who you are) here are "12 Most Hilarious Blue Screen of Death Appearances".

Apparently One Can Be Hunky Dory And Effed Up At The Same Time

WTFoto's newest field correspondent, Oosh, snapped this photo of a sign seen at an Asian food shop at GSU, in GA.  I edited the picture to keep it safe for work.  Click on it for enbiggened goodness.

 

Oh boy, where to begin on this one.  I assume this restaurant was named Hunky Dory, which starts this post strong right out of the gate.  And apparently said business was forced to close for some reason and for that they apologize.  Also they are (self proclaimed) "F****d up", whatever that is referring to.  But fear not, they'll be reopening in the near future featuring "great fusion Food" which will include tacos and Hibachi (a taste combination second only to peanut butter and chocolate).  But most important of all: WATCH YOUR STEP.

Delicious, Yes. Natural? Not So Much.

I was at the grocery store the other day when I saw the Frito-Lay vendor setting up this display.  Please note the product he has put on the bottom shelf.  I'm sure this was intended for a baked variety of chip, not those.  I'm sure that most people will agree that when one buys Doritos, it isn’t because they want a "natural" snack.  For those who are interested, here is the Doritos nutrition label.  The word "artificial" is only used twice and there is only one word that I cannot pronounce.

The Handicapped Are Recyclable

I was recently at a state park for a family gathering when I saw this.  Now I’m certain that this sign is supposed to be indicating that this is a handicap accessible trashcan.  However, since they decided to use a circle to represent the waste, it appears that this is now a receptacle for the handicapped people, or at least their wheelchairs.  So my message to you is this: no matter what signs may tell you, never throw away a person in a wheelchair.

Maybe A Dog Made The Rule

Yet another contribution by field correspondent Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq.

 

He writes:  A coworker and I were playing a round of golf this week and saw this sign on the door.  The "rough" in golf is the area of taller grass outside of the fairway.  The "ruff," on the other hand, either refers to a Eurasian Sandpiper, the collar seen in 16th century formal wear, or Dennis the Menace's dog.  Not sure which of those they are trying to protect from high heat and errantly driven carts.

This Is Why I Have This Blog

Soooo, let's just have a look at what we've got here, shall we? (click the picture to enbiggen).  This appears to be a section of car, approximately from the dashboard to the front of the seats, lying upside, down barely off the road.  This car piece was in this location for almost two weeks.  Let the questions begin...  Did someone think that this was the ideal location to discard said car part (much like an empty soda bottle)?  Did it slide off a trailer and the person hauling it not notice (maybe the leaves dampened the noise)?  Or perhaps was there a car accident and this is all that is left after the firefighters took the Jaws of Life to it (and hauled away the rest)?

None of these are particularly satisfying explanations so if you have any of your own, please feel free to share.

In Communist Russia...

Frankie saw this and sent it my way.  There is something just a little bit creepy when a food item thinks you're delicious.  I understand that Dove is trying to be witty but I think they missed it on this one. Unless, of course, this is an omen of the impending chocolate uprising..

Yes, Daddy, Please Do That

Here is another in my "Marquee Madness" series.  Click the picture to enbiggen.  If you couldn't read it or were just to lazy to enbiggen, this Andy's Custard marquee reads "KICK IT WITH A BOOT DADDY."  I am wide open to any interpretation that my dear readers would like to provide.

Isn't That Pretty Much The Opposite Of What You Want?

Frankie snapped this picture and sent it to me. Click the image to enbiggen.

Yeah, yeah..  I know it's a marketing ploy:  "Our incense is so strong it's a biohazzard!"  But really, is that what you want?  Open package, evacuate room?  It would be like having a nuclear battery in your cell phone.  Uh, oh...

Politcal Signs, Part Deux

In my opinion there is enough anxiety, apprehension, and insecurity about the government without explicitly adding more.  On the other hand, you have to give credit to Mr. Angst for being upfront about it.

It's The Smiley That Brings It All Together

Here is another from Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq.

I saw this at the restaurant next door to my office.  It appears they are fine if I just want to roll my cooler of tall boys in with me for lunch.  In fact, I saw a couple who were going in for dinner each carrying a couple of beers.

Editor's note:  I had no idea that is was even legal.  And back to that smiley:  is this really something that warrants a smiley face?  I would think that whatever they did to lose their liquor licence would be a little more serious than that.

Septober? Octember?

I saw this banner on a recent trip to the Quad Cities with Frankie (click the picture to enbiggen).  It's a bit hard to read but this sign proudly announces that this establishment will be having their Oktoberfest on September 23rd and 24th.  It looks like the Germans are following the lead of the retail industry and starting their celebrations a month early.  Septemberfest:  brought to you by the fine folks who sell Christmas decorations at Halloween.

When Easy Just Isn't Easy Enough

Isn't the point of the pop-top cans to eliminate the need for a can opening tool?  Now if there was just a product that could help you use this; maybe a Easy Open POP 'N PULL Extra Grip Glove.

At Least He's Following The Rules Of The Road

So I captured this sight with my dashcam (click to enbiggen).  Nothing to worry about here, folks.  Just a dude pretending his wheelchair is a vehicle.  If he got lights installed on it he wouldn't have to use hand signals.  I wonder how he ended up in that thing in the first place...

You Should "Let It Loose", "Give It Up" and "Surrender"

Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq. took this picture and sent it to me.

The only thing her T-shirt is missing is the phrase "Because if you do..."  It is hard to see, but she also has the pink headphones on to complete the package.

Editor's Note:  Because nothing is hipper than a reference to a 1987 Gloria Estefan song.  And if you didn't get the title, those are also songs off the "Let It Loose" album.

That's Just Crazy Enough To Work

I saw this marque sign recently (click the picture to enbiggen).  It's a bit fuzzy, but it reads "POSSIBLE SALES?"  Yes, it actually ends with a question mark.  I have no idea why they decided to ask the public in general if having a sale is a good plan.  Maybe including everyone in the business plan helps cement the goodwill part of Goodwill.

Safety First

Field Correspondent Bat captured this shot and sent it my way.  Click the pic to enbiggen.

There is road construction in my area and recently this showed up.  I assume this guy was put in the area to draw attention to the construction site and promote safety.  It succeeds at exactly half of its goals.  I'm pretty sure the "safety notice" shouldn't be so distracting that it causes people to stare at it and drift from one lane to another.  Which happens.

I Like His Attitude!

I'm back, Baby!!! Hopefully I'll be able to get back to my regular posting schedule. Reminder, if you see something that makes you think, "What The F...oto" send it my way.

This post is inspired by Frankie and based loosely on what she said when she saw this.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Are you tired of all the bureaucracy? FUGIT!

Are you sick of never having your political voice heard? FUGIT!

If you are fed up with government in general, then just say FUGIT!!!

Supposedly 2.298 Pounds of Therapeutic Heat

This is a What The Screenshot, but worth the look anyway.  Click the picture to enbiggen.  You can also see it for yourself here. 

Did you spot it?  Take another look.  Right there after the price. Yes that is a per ounce cost for a heating pad.  As if that wasn't odd enough, the math isn't even right.  According to that page the shipping weight is 1.4 pounds, which would make this cost $1.66/ounce.  So we have a product that has a ridiculous per unit price which isn't correct.  Well done, Amazon.

Tur,Duc,Hen

I didn't mean to take a nearly month-long sabbatical, but I'm back!

Let's get this out of the way first:  it's turducken not Tur-Duc-Hen.  Secondly, isn't then entire point of serving one of these monstrosities is that you make it yourself?  Finally, who in their right mind would pay $70 for this?  Nothing screams "Happy Holidays" like a 15 pound creole-seasoned poultry-and-waterfowl layer cake.