Key & Peele Approved Soda

Our newest field corespondent, Allute, saw this while dining out recently and sent it my way.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Mayhap their waiter was Australian:
"What can I get everyone to drink?  You want a Diet Pepsi?  NOICE!  And you also want a Diet Pepsi?  NOICE!  And for you?  A Diet Pepsi, as well?  NOICE!  Last but not least?  A fourth Diet Pepsi??  NOICE!!!

Good Luck Sleeping Tonight

I saw these things in the basement of a dental client at my previous job.  Click to enbiggen (if you dare).

What we have here, my friends, are a stuffed monkey and donkey both sporting human teeth.  I assume that the intent was to show kids how to properly brush their teeth but these existential nightmares most likely simply scarred the children for life.  And thus they are in the basement, plotting their revenge.

Too Much Of A Good Thing?

Field correspondent, JG, snapped this pic and sent it to me.  No need to enbiggen this one.

He says:
I like bacon just as much as the next guy but I didn’t know this was a thing. Do you just eat it straight or does it come with sides?

In my opinion, bacon stands alone and needs no accompaniments.  Except maybe a defibrillator.

Clip Proximity Ban

I saw this at a client's office when I was at my previous job.

I think what they are getting at with this sign is that they do not want paperclips going through the document feeder of the copy machine.  Or maybe that isn't actually a copy machine but actually an MRI and they don't want paperclips flying around.  Or maybe they're just idiots.

How Do You Know It’s Time To Go To The Bathroom? The Clock Says It’s Poo-thirty.

Another excellent submission from Lord Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq.  Please clicken to enbiggen.

He writes:
I'm in a government building in Jefferson City when I spotted this gem.  I think I understand what they are trying to convey.  I think they are suggesting that some wall-hating snowflakes may be sensitive to your perfume so now nobody can smell nice at the office.  But the placement of this in the bathroom (both on the mirror, and on the door on the way out), gave the appearance that they wanted me to use some sort of trap-a-crap or poo-pourri if I were to bless the building with the bounty of my bowels.  As much as I wanted to make a stink statement in protest, my breakfast burrito was not yet locked 'n loaded, and the premises were not friendly.  So you get this pic instead - enjoy.

Should Have Called It 'That's What She Said (She Shed?) Storage'

Today's excellent contribution is courtesy of Outlaw.  Click the picture if you would like to enbiggen it.

This is all Outlaw:
Having trouble finding the spot to store that package? Looking for a nice place to hide that tool you aren't using? Is it your first time? Well, we're here to help! Bring that thing out and "STICK IT HERE"! Anyone in the community will tell you that our little hot spot is a safe and inviting location to stick your stuff! Worried about space? Worry no more! With over 40 years of experience our location has expanded enough to accommodate just about anything you want to put in here! Need a smaller space? We invite you to stick it in the back! Our "back door" units are rarely used but provide the perfect amount of space to stuff your junk, even if for just a short amount of time. And if you think you're bringing more than we can handle, we can assure you that flexibility is not an issue. We'll let you stick it in multiple spaces! So grab your stuff, bring your friends and we'll set you up to STICK IT HERE!

Where Sheldon Cooper Fills Up

Sometimes I wonder if this is my blog or Shu's but here is his latest contribution.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Price of gas holding steady at $3.14159 9/10 per gallon.

If It Looks Like A Duck...

I found this picture hiding on my desktop, which I took at a cabin we were staying at for a certain couple's wedding.  Click to enbiggen.

In case you cannot read it, it says "Ashtray.  A smokin' great deal."  Which, in my opinion, is just weird.  This is obviously an ashtray.  Were the manufacturers tired of answering calls asking what their product is for?  And if your product needs to have a label explaining what it is, adding a marketing tag line seems less than productive.  Maybe Ford needs to make the all new "2021 Car: Gets you from here to there".

Call Now! Operators Standing By!

Today's post comes from regular contributor, Shu.  Click the picture if you wish to enbiggen

He writes:
"Thank you for calling. What part of 'No current space available' did you not understand?"

Chinese Penis Trap?

We received a shipment at work and I noticed this icon on the box.  Click to enbiggen.

Now I'm certain that is supposed to indicate that two people should lift the box.  But that's really not what is looks like.  What it looks like to me is that Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg have decided to do a sequel to "Dick in a Box".

Update:  I showed this to my coworker, Allute, and he told me that this post should have been named "Dock In A Box".  And he is 100% correct.

The Military Has An Interesting Signing Bonus

Mrs. Griz sent this to me a long time ago and I just found it again.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

No, this is not actually a request for women to join the exciting lifestyle of a military spouse as it first appears.  I guess they are trying to hire military wives to do... something.  Or maybe not.  Perhaps it's actually asking for women to become part-time wives.  What I'm saying is that this ad really isn't clear.

Deal Of The Century!

Today's post comes from the ever prolific, Shu.  Click on the picture and send him some love.

He writes:
It's way more than I can eat, but at this price, it's impossible to pass up!

I Think That's A Protest Bus

I saw this a couple weeks ago.  I don't think you need to enbiggen this one but feel free if you'd like.

You know, the right angle changes everything.  Like in this example.  The placement of that sign really alters the vibe this bus is trying to put out.  Or perhaps the bus is tired of dealing with the little brats all day and just wants to make its feelings known.

English As A Third, Maybe Fourth, Language

I purchased a USB fan for camping.  It works quite well, however this is the box in which it came.  Please click the picture to enbiggen.

I really want to know how many times that was run through Google Translate before this popped out.  And don't miss out on the "Moisture Proof" badge at the bottom.

Alcohol & Tobacco Machine?

I saw this on a gas station entry recently.  Clicken to enbiggen if you wish.

To be clear, I agree it is important to ensure that minors are not purchasing or using these products (one has to survive more life for those privileges) but why did they stick "ATM" at the bottom of this sign.  Those are two completely different concepts they are trying to convey.  Or, perhaps, it is the ATM that has the concern and enforces this policy.

For Muggle Use Only

Today's submission comes from BeerGirl's boss, Ms. E.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Not suitable for flying?  NOT SUITABLE FOR FLYING?!?  Well, bigwigs at Sabco, you have just lost a customer.  Good day.  I said good day!

More Bang For Your Buck

My sister snapped this picture and sent it my way.  Click to enbiggen.

I haven't priced out bangs lately but $225 per bang seems pretty reasonable to me.

Preferred By Those With A Preference

I saw this near the mall on my way to work a couple weeks ago.  I was lucky enough to snap a pic while stopped at a traffic light.

"We know you have a choice in mobile scrub stores and we thank you for choosing us."

They are not America's favorite uniform store.  They don't claim to be America's favorite medical garb store.  They don't even state they are America's favorite store to buy scrubs.  But if you need that scrub store to come to you, they're the go-to people.

Know Your Clientele

I saw this sign while at a client.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Did you enbiggen?  If not, yes that is indeed a sign offering free ice in a restroom.  Because clearly one is thinking about the next drink while getting rid of the last one.  And again, yes, it does indeed say "Located Below Slide" underneath the lede.  Oddly, that does actually make sense.

The Rest From Utila

Since my posting has been so hit and miss lately, here are the last three WTFotos from our trip to Utila.  As always, click the picture to enbiggen.


This party is so awesome it'll make you do a double junk kick (lower left corner).

You know how I love misused quotes. Are they asking for one to talk into an anus?

And, finally, just everything about this picture.

Don't Just Poke The Surface

Sorry for the inconsistent posting as of late.  Like has been sucking somewhat.  On to the post.  I found this pic in a old email and do not recall who sent it to me.  Please let me know if you recognize it so I can give proper credit.  You will absolutely want to click to enbiggen.

Those who know me know that I love me some bad translation and this is an awesome example.  I think this came with some needle craft project.  First, they use the word "poke" a LOT.  The random capitalization and spacing is nice.  I also really enjoy that they threw in "oh" in that last paragraph so it seems more conversational and natural. 

That Seems Right

Field correspondent Musicmannn saw this while at the pharmacy and sent the pic my way.

This really raises a lot of questions but I'm going to just let the picture speak for itself.

Little Green Man

I just got back from Central America and have plenty of WTFotos from that trip but before then...

I found this at one of the local discount, off-price retailers in the kitchen section.  Please click the picture to enbiggen.

This is a kitchen multitool that assists in opening a variety of lids.  But what's going on down there near the legs?  Maybe it's just me, but I wouldn't say he was "little".

Umm. Wut?

One of the clients for whom I do work is a dental office.  I was there recently doing some work when I noticed this note below a monitor on the wall.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Yep.  There is it.  Please keep the Christmas trees when sucking.

Relax. It's Just A Wet Floor.

I saw this sign (cone? standee?) while at a national fast food chain. 

I'm not sure that guy in the triangle slipped.  He appears to be just chillin'; kicked back and legs crossed.  I thought about drawing a couch in there with a Sharpie but I have absolutely no artistic skills.

Maybe You Should Retrace Your Steps

One of our favorite field correspondents, Lord Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq., sent this to me recently.  Clicken to enbiggen.

He writes:
I saw this in the local paper.  It was an article on recognizing the signs of Alzheimer's disease.  I think confusion and repeating oneself were on the list also.

Worst Rewards Program Ever

Today we get yet another contribution from Shu.  Click to enbiggen

He writes:
Maybe it's not so bad. If you go there every day, you save $10.95 over the course of a year. $10.98 in leap years.

RIP, Rocky Raccoon

BeerGirl and I went to the Soulard farmers' market a while ago when we saw this sign.  Click to enbiggen.

There is a lot to unpack with this sign but what I am most curious about is how many times they were asked "Hey, do you have raccoon meat?" that they were compelled to put up a sign.  I guess they finally got tired of having to say "For the last time, YES."  And who knew that there were so many farmers' market patrons clamoring for raccoon meat.  We chose not to peruse their wares.

Finally. Clothing Tag Humor.

BeerGirl bought a dress off the interwebs and when it arrived, she found this.

I do have to say, it would be a very ineffective napkin.

Sweetener For Tea, Earl Grey, Hot

Today's pic comes from our newest field correspondent, ScottyP.   Click the picture to enbiggen.

What we have here is a box of Sugar In The Raw, 2 lb. box.  Please note the best by date: 06/21/2387A.  I had no idea that sugar would stay good for several centuries but, as a student of life, I'm always learning new things.

Tom Tucker's Son's Parking Space

Today's contribution comes from longtime correspondent, Shu.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

He writes:
Parking space at a pharmacy in New Bern, N.C. If anyone can think of any definition for this sign, be my guest. But you can't park here.

It's Not The Size Of Your Ticket...

I saw this sign in a local parking garage recently and something about it caught my eye.  You may click the picture to enbiggen.

The wording on it is just fine but that icon in the upper right seems off.  Is this place issuing poster-sized tickets?  I've never seen one that takes two hands to carry.  Perhaps that is the international symbol for parking ticket and I've just never seen it before. So many questions.