Just Like Every Child Is A Winner...

Another submission from regular contributor Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq.

How is that special?  It seems that you have either your special margarita, or your "every day" margarita but one cannot be both.

Editor's Note: Of course you can have a special every day.  I know some people who are very special every day.

Well, Lookie Here

Some of the best WTFotos cannot be stopped.  Field correspondent Outlaw said he doesn't even remember taking this but, thankfully, he did.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Someone at that store has an awesome sense of humor.  My favorite thing about this is the wide selection of sizes offered. Of magnifying glasses that is.

Has Sweeny Todd Set Up Shop?

Field correspondent, Lando, sent this my way.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

Nothing frightening about this sign. The printed letters aren't straight, the arrow is hand drawn and there is a tiny dollar sign (with no price).  And it is "HAIR CUT", singular.  Nope, not a trap at all.

Apparently One Is Enough

Today's post comes from regular contributor Captain Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq.

I found this funny as it is "a" suggestive comment.  What kind of movie would only have one?  Usually it is all or nothing.  And what did that comment suggest; that you must bring your parent along and isn't that when you want to leave your parent at home?  I wanted to rent the movie just to see if I could pick out which comment it was.

Editor's note: Everyone knows how delicate the snowflakes are these days, so even one suggestive comment could cause permanent psychological damage.  The MPAA just cannot take that risk.

At Least It Has Free Shipping

Today's post comes from our newest field correspondent, Thintoast.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

I may not be a financial analyst but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express  last night...

Your Packages Check In But They Don't Check Out

The ever brilliant Griz sent me this picture and the accompanying comments below.  Please to enjoy. 

Or,
All your package are belong to us.
Or,
What part of "letter" carrier do you not understand?
Or,
Screw it, I'll spend five minutes jamming this into your mailbox instead of  two just walking it to your door. I got spare time.
Or,
My bunion hurts. Now your knuckles will, too.
Or,
We put the Vice in Postal Service, as in, we used one to get this package in your mailbox, sucka!
Or,
Hey, I noticed you didn't pay for package protection...

Who Wants Soup?

Before this week's post, What The Foto now has its own email address.  If you have a picture that fits the bill, send it to WTFotoPics [at] outlook [dot] com (spelled out to reduce spam).

On to Millersburger's great pic!

I'm making this another audience participation post.  Put your suggestions in the comments and I'll post the best ones here.  I shall begin...

 - Mmmmm...  Salty...

 - Isn't that where pea soup comes from?

 - Contains natural and artificial cock flavors.
 - Outlaw: "I'll have the clam chowder, please." (Editor's note: I prefer chowerless clams)
 - Thomas: "Grace has been cockin' up the soup since 1922. Put some in your mouth and you'll be duly impressed."
 - Anonymous: "Maybe its just soup made with man chicken flavor?" (Editor's note: By "man chicken", I hope you're referring to the large chicken Peter fights on Family Guy)
 - Thintoast: "HAHAHA!!! This is a penis joke.  (Editor's note: This gets my vote for best comment so far.)

Too Stoned To Know If You're Stoned?

Today's submission comes from field correspondent, Outlaw...

The dollar store, I've discovered, is a fine place to get cleaning supplies for super cheap. Granted, you won't find everything you need at such a price, but you might wander upon something you least expect. Normally I don't pay much attention to anything other than what I'm there for, but I'm glad I saw this. I actually had to stop and go back to make sure that I saw what I thought I saw. 

I'm going to be perfectly honest here, I wasn't even aware that there were at home drug tests like this. Then again... I suppose there might be a market for those who enjoy smoking from time to time and might be worried about a random drug test, or perhaps they have a job interview coming up. Who knows. Now, the pregnancy test I get. Signs pop up where you wonder, you don't know for sure and you need an answer... But how blitzed do you have to be that you need to administer your OWN test to see if you've smoked pot? "Wow man... Did I smoke last night? No... Nah, I'm sure I didn't... Then again, I am really hungry for Doritos's and pizza... I could put away a case of Mountain Dew... Maybe I'm high? Nah... Maybe... Shit, I'd better get tested..."

Generic, Slightly Racist, Seasoning

I saw this while shopping the other day.  Click the picture to enbiggen.

The good folks at Family Gourmet are selling genuine "Soul Food Seasoning".  Hmmm, let's delve into this a bit.  Wikipedia has a list of soul food which includes extremely varied foods from fried chicken to pickled pigs feet to sweet potato pie.  I highly doubt that there is one seasoning which one would want to use in all of these recipes.  I guess there is a possibility that Family Gourmet doesn't really know what soul food is.  I wonder what the percentage is of Caucasians working there...

If It's STD, You Don't Pee

I was sent this a while ago by someone and I cannot recall who.  Let me know and I will provide proper credit.

If you're here at the STD (sex) clinic (doctor) because your genitalia (hooha or wee wee) is causing discomfort (ouchies), your urine (pee) will be needed for diagnostics (tests) to determine (figger out) what your diagnoses (how much antibiotic) is.

Also, stop sleeping around and keep it in your pants for a while.