The Definition of CYA

So I was enjoying some peanuts the other day (the honey-roasted kind, thank you for asking) and was bored so I started reading the label. In case the giant letters spelling "PEANUTS" on the front were not enough, we have the ingredients (that one I can understand and let slide), the statement "CONTAINS: PEANUT" (well, duh! and I'm not sure why it is singular), and well as this gem: "MANUFACTURED ON EQUIPMENT THAT PROCESSES NUTS." It's that last one that gets me. In how many ways does one need to be told that there is a possibility that the nuts you are about to eat may have at one time touched another nut? There is a bonus warning near the bottom that says to not give nuts to children under 6, due to the choking hazard presented by them.

I say it's time to shake off this oppressive blanket of terror presented by nuts and outlaw them completely. Who's with me?

You Think Your Job Sucks?

Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq. once again graces us with a contribution...

I saw this tidbit on the way home for lunch today. As I turned toward my house I fell in behind this pickup truck. It is a poor picture, but if you enbiggen (as our host would say) you will note the poor sap riding in the back of the pickup, holding onto some loose item to keep it from flying out. At the time, it was 9 Degrees F., and if he is travelling 25 mph that would produce a -12 degree F. wind chill factor. I think I'll complain a little less at work today. Unless of course he is helping his buddy move, in which case he is just an idiot.

Ninjas Can Look Like Anyone

This entry comes from our newest correspondent, TMDA.

I was behind this car driven by an old lady with her seat pulled all the way up. Her license plate read SWORD (click to enbiggen).

Editor's note: This simply goes to prove that ninjas obviously live and work among us. One must exercise great care so as not to anger them and bring the wrath of the ninja sword upon oneself.

UPDATE: WhiskeyGirl, TMDA's better half, says "I think that little old lady was actually referring to the S-WORD on her license plate. Perhaps as a cue to those behind her of what curse word to shout when she inevitably throws on her breaks or fails to accelerate when expected."

Close Enough

Please direct your attention to the yellow lines on the road. Play special attention to the peculiar intersection of the lines (click the picture to enbiggen). The reason I like this is that the individuals responsible for painting the lines on the road made an attempt to have them meet, but it was half-assed at best. Now before you assume that maybe this is the result of road crews from different departments working independently, let me assure you that this is not located at a city, county or any other socioeconomic boundary. It's just a place in the road where the painters said "Screw it, that's close enough."

Yellow Jacket Trap

This post comes from correspondent Griff.

He writes: "Because, as we all know- jackets blue in hue are easy to subdue. Jackets yellow will kill a fellow. Wonder what a jacket trap looks like anyway..."

Well, Griff, I did some research and found this picture of one in use.

The Price of Disobedience

The sign clearly states "Motorcycle Only." You, sir or madam, assumed that your bicycle was close enough to being a motorcycle that you could park it there. You should not have. Now, not only has your bicycle been confiscated, your seat and helmet have been left behind (tethered and locked to the sign) as a warning to you and your ilk. Disobedience has a price, sir or madam, and hopefully you have learned your lesson. If you have any questions, please click on the picture to enbiggen.

A Clear Conveyance of Information

Here is another one from field reporter Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq. (this was given to me a couple of weeks ago, so don't think he's touched in the head because he's checking his fantasy football team during playoffs).

So I'm checking NFL.com to see how I might expect my fantasy football opponent's player to do tonight, and I click on a page that has a comparison between the two teams. I scroll down to "The Matchup", and just stare at the chart until my eyes hurt. I keep going back to the page, and for the life of me, I can't tell the difference between the two colors representing each team. On the bars, I can barely tell a shade's difference, but on the squares that indicate which color represents which team, they look exactly the same to me. It seems if you want to convey information, you should not pick two colors within 1 degree of each other on the proverbial color wheel. That is just my thought about it.

A Bowl and a Bowl

I apologize about the hiatus. Holidays, family, blah, blah, blah... But we are back for the new year!


So I needed to use the restroom of a locally-owned store when I found this scene. That is a bowl and spoon on the back of the toilet. I assume that those are simply placed there and are not intended for bathroom use. Now I understand that small stores may only have sinks in the bathrooms, so it would be perfectly natural to use one to clean your dishes. What I don’t understand is why anyone would store their dishes in there. To be perfectly clear, I did not do anything to that bowl and spoon (other than taking a picture), but I know plenty of people who are more mischievous than myself.