I Blame the Mormons

Sorry for not posting on Tuesday; damn job is seriously infringing on my personal life. Anywho, this comes from Momosan. It should be mentioned that she was in Utah when she took these pictures. She writes:
I apologize for the poor quality of the first photo. The gentleman behind the counter seemed peeved that I was, I'm sure it appeared, about to take a picture of him, so I rushed it and ended up with a blurry shot.

So, you'll notice that the dispenser is labeled "multi-purpose spoons". Since the fork and knife dispensers were simply labeled "fork" and "knife" I assumed that these were some kind of special spoons, perhaps even sporks! We were in a little cafeteria-type place that served a variety of foods, so that made sense to me. I didn't need a spoon for my Diet Coke, but I had to see what kind of modifications had been made to make these spoons so multi-functional. As you can see in the next photo, I was sorely disappointed.

Now, I don't really understand much about Mormons outside of their special undergarments and their history with bigamist hebephiles. Do their laws go so far as to dictate the use of silverware? "Ice cream and soup? No, surely not." Maybe they're implying that the average tourist is too stupid to see the multiple uses for them. "Debbie, I've got sherbet, pudding and a dish of peas on this here tray...better get a different utensil for each."

Get 'Em Started Early

QueenBee found this and sent it to me (click picture to enbiggen). She writes "I found this at ***A Major Retailer***. They are cups with characters on them and a ping pong ball that looks like an eye ball. ***The Major Retailer*** has decided to teach kids how to master beer pong at an early age!

Editor's note: The tag line on the box states "So easy, it's impossible". If you have ever played beer pong, you will agree. As an aside, that would be one large cup of beer to drink...

Not For 0-3 Unhappy Onions

I wrote about my miniature Stonehenge in an earlier post, but I never really noticed the side of the box it came in. Of course that symbol means "not for children under the age of three" but it's just weird. I'm not sure who refers to their baby as being zero. Also, why does the "child" look like an onion. And why is he (she?) so unhappy about not being able to play with the Stonehenge? So, in summary, never give a miniature model of Stonehenge to less than three unhappy onions. This PSA brought to you by the concerned folks at What The Foto.

Hospitals Can Create A Sticky Situation

WiskeyGirl sent this one my way. She writes: "I just cannot understand why they did not put patient pick up there rather than discharge. It is on a hospital for goodness sakes.. of course I am going to think of some bodily fluid if they have discharge posted."

(Editor's note) This is the kind of picture I love because it opens the door for so many puns.
- If the patient is still discharging, they probably shouldn't be released.
- Is this the emergency room for a priapism?
- HELLLOOOOO NURSE!!!
- Is that entrance supposed to be that color?
- That is the most appropriate usage of a "Do Not Enter" sign ever.

Feel free to add yours in the comments.

The Smooth, Refreshing Taste of Sewer Smoke

Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq. comes through once again. Click picture to enbiggen.

So here is a little gem I found today (9/7/10). On my way to court in Huntsville I see this hand lettered sign near the city limit. I assume this is some city project in order to locate possible leaks in the city sewer system, as that is the normal purpose of this activity. My questions/observations: 1. It isn't a garage sale, put up a real sign; 2. Don't have your 4 year-old create the sign with her magic marker set; 3. Note the date on the sign (June 23), does it really take that long? Are you done yet? How did your sign stay in such fantastic condition for almost 2.5 months. I just found the whole thing rather odd.

(Editor's note) I think Dr. Mac missed a very big number 4: What in the hell is a sewer smoke test? Sounds like a snipe hunt to me.

I Didn't Realize There Was A Tampon Problem

This is another catch by QueenBee.
I have to assume that this is an old pharmacy bottle, but even the mighty Google can't tell me anything about what this was all about (click here to see for yourself). Apparently, at some point in history, someone combined alum (hydrated potassium aluminium sulfate), boric acid and glycerine and used it in conjunction with with a feminine hygiene product. Or it is some kind of hoax. Those are my best guesses, anyone have a better one?

Slide of Death

You will probably want to click the picture to enbiggen. I'm not certain those parents love their children. Note where the slide terminates: right at the precipice of that extremely steep slope. And there is nothing to stop them until they reach the fence. Maybe the parents use it as a punishment: "Eat your broccoli or I'll make you go slide..."

Chaps For All Occasions

Griff sent this to me. This is what happens when someone tries to create a product market that just isn't there. So I can understand ranching, riding and maybe even construction but bird hunting??? And I have gone camping more times than I can count and have never needed chaps (the same cannot be said for Dr. "The Original Chip" Mac, esq and WhiskeyGirl). Why not just keep listing activities? Protect your legs while pole vaulting, repairing clocks, karaoking, even blogging. Now if Griff had just included the phone number in the picture...