I Wanna Be A Cowboy

Field correspondent Shu comes through once more...

He writes: I've never considered converting, but how can anyone resist this? Granted, I never knew that "Git along little dogies" was scripture. Do congregants park their horses in the parking lot or are there pews designed for the horses? Do congregants keep their hats on during services, which would be consistent with many religions? Cowboy up. Amen."

Ready For A Trainwreck

What you are looking at here, ladies and gentlemen, is literally a truckload of spine boards.  These are usually used transport people with traumatic spinal injuries.  Why this truck is packed to overflowing with them is an answer I cannot provide.  Maybe there is a bustling trade in second-hand spine boards and I was just not aware of it.  I just hope they weren't stolen from those in need.  I'm imagining a writhing, moaning pile of people with broken backs and that is just not right.

One Little Missing Letter...

I was buying donuts for the coworkers when I saw this sign (click the picture to enbiggen).  It's amazing how excluding a single letter can change a simple request into a disturbing statement.  Is anyone else bothered by the phrase "Please us a tissue"?

Please Move Three Feet To The Right

Correspondent Stroker sent this picture to me.

Click the picture to enbiggen.  No confusion going on here.  PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE ASHTRY IMMEDIATELY TO YOUR RIGHT!!!  Perhaps it's a psychology experiment, hoping that the smokers will be so confused that they just quit.  Mayhap it is an art project commenting on the dichotomy of healthcare in America today and how people are caught in the middle.  Or maybe, just maybe, the manager of that building has mental dwarfism.

Squirrels Gone Wild

I recently went on a road trip out west with my father and brother. One of the places we visited was the Grand Canyon. In the tour bus were various banners, including the one above (click the picture to enbiggen). This sign has a perfectly reasonable request: don't feed the animals. What caught my attention was the small brown sign in it. Let's take a closer look, shall we?

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that is a depiction of a cute squirrel taking a large clunk out of a finger with stylized drops of blood. I'm pretty sure I've never seen a sign that is simultaneously so cute and so graphic at the same time.

Soooo, Parking There Is Required?

A coworker sent this to me. This sign is on the entrance to the parking lot of a local pizza establishment that has been around for ever. The reason it has made it here isn't the witty text at the bottom (though that is worth a read), but the "No Parking Prohibited" on the right hand sign. I'm sure it's supposed to say that the list of vehicles is prohibited, but that's just not how it's written. What it states is that those vehicles are prohibited from not parking there. I wonder how that ordinance got passed...

Maybe His Superpower Is X-ray Vision

FieryK's friend "P" sent me another.
He writes: "This guy was sitting across from me on the plane. It's so bizarre I don't even know how to describe it. Does he take his glasses off his head and put them over his eyes when he wants to sleep? Does he wear the sleep mask when he drives?"

Editor's note: The crowning touch is the earplugs. He certainly doesn't want to be disturbed while he is pretending to read.